Ever had that feeling on Sunday… the sad (blue) feeling that the weekend is ending and reality is taking hold? In my house, we call this the Sunday Blues.
The day before I start school… well there’s a whole different name for that. It’s the End of Summer Blues. It actually lasts longer than a day …. In fact, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel this way all week long. I am sad to have to share my children with the world and not find joy in their eyes during every minute of every day (although I know I must). I am sad not to sit at our new breakfast bar and have a coffee with my husband in the morning (School mornings are so rushed!), and I am sad not to be able to stay up until 2 am watching episodes of Mad Men (my new favorite show).
Then I sometimes feel guilty for feeling sad. After all, I have the best job in the world! I love my job. And how many people get to take summers off to enjoy these moments I love so much? Sometimes I spend my time feeling guilty about being sad. It’s my teacher guilt creeping up on me.
So after all week of having all these feelings… I am going to come out and say it.
Feeling this way does not mean I am a bad teacher!
It does not mean that I am not thankful for the time I do have off, It’s just the way I feel.
-Feeling this way means I am more than a teacher. I pour so much of my heart and soul into my students each school year that these moments when I can just BE with my family are precious and so appreciated. It is not wrong to be sad to have to divide my time. We say goodbye to so many things at the end of the summer.
I know I’ll say hello to wonderful things too.
Tomorrow I will be filled with excitement and anticipation as I greet all of my fellow teachers in the morning. It will be filled with nervousness and to do lists and joy as I imagine those new faces entering my room this week.
But for now, I am just feeling kind of sad about the things I’ll say goodbye to.
Feeling this way doesn’t mean I am a bad teacher. Feeling this way means I am human.